How Will Having a Sibling with Special Needs Affect My Other Children?
While having a sibling with special needs may present unique challenges, it also provides many opportunities for children’s positive growth and character development. Studies of families who have children with special needs have shown that their siblings can benefit in many ways. For example, these siblings often exhibit a level of maturity above that of their peers and tend to have more highly developed communication and social skills. The experience and knowledge gained by having a sibling with special needs also seems to make children more accepting and appreciative of differences. They tend to be more aware of the difficulties that others might be going through, and often surprise parents, teachers and others with their wisdom, insight and empathy. Brothers and sisters of individuals with special needs are also very much aware of their sibling’s challenges and often take a tremendous amount of pride in his or her accomplishments. In addition, parents often report that no matter what issues siblings may have with their brother or sister with special needs at home, outside the home they are typically loyal to their sibling and do their best to defend and protect them.
When telling your children that their little brother or sister has special needs, tailor your explanation to their age and ability to comprehend. Encourage your children to ask questions about whatever they do not understand. Most children are able to grasp that a child with special needs may need extra care, and they often take special pride in helping their new sibling. Remember that your children will take their cue from you. If you are able to communicate excitement about their sibling, they will be excited too.
Try to keep up family routines and traditions, and do not curb family activities out in the community any more than is necessary. This will help your other children come to terms with their sibling’s condition while giving your child with special needs many varied experiences. Brothers and sisters are often the first to realize that their new sibling is more like other kids than different, with his or her own unique personality, and that like all members of the family, he or she will have strengths, challenges and much to contribute.